Ain't no mama got time fo dat!

I haven't been around much lately because the nitty gritty business of just living has been getting in the way of the more gentile and pleasurable aspects of life such as blogging, crafting and documenting. Activities which I bitterly  miss.

To put in plainly I have been grafting, earning my crust, busting my gut...We had no money so I had to get a job or two.  And I have been learning a lot about myself and the world through this experience.  For one thing, I totally get why poor people take out loans; because having no money is depressing, it really sucks, so you cheer yourself up by buying and doing things you can't really afford, taking a holiday to France for example, buying lottery tickets, getting a takeaway every Friday night, thinking "blow it, let's try for another baby" (and by the way since when did having children become a privilege of the rich?) I have a new-found sympathy for those on low-income.

But in putting my nose to the grindstone I have realised how severely neglected my creative inner world has been, and it's been suffering (I've been suffering) big time.  I didn't really realise quite how much I needed it until this morning when I took a gander through an old sketchbook. I was immediately taken back to a time before I had children when I had the luxury motivation to be able to take time to really reflect on my inner creative world, search my soul, listen to my whispers, hear my hearts calling etc etc etc. I was at a real high point in my creative journey where I felt on the cusp of something big, things were coming together, symbols, art pieces, meaning.

Some of my old sketchbook pages.

And then BAM...Children, and suddenly you think that  nurturing your creative spirit isn't a priority any more, or useful, or important.

It's not like I sat down one day and though "oh well, you know what? I don't really need all that arting around, it was all just a bit of a lark really, now I have to get on with the serious business of raising children."  It happened slowly, over time, almost without me noticing; my ability to be able to sit down and really reflect, search, discover, create, has been chipped away at, though tiredness, lack of free time, distractions (curse you Facebook) I have neglected to make a priority of these essential explorations.  And equally as imperceptibly a whole part of my spirit, my personality in a sense, has been degrading and has left me with strange empty gap which I have rather unhelpfully filled with feelings of anger, resentment and frustration. I can't blame my children, it's not their fault and they fill up another part of my soul even more measurably than that lack of creativity empties another.  I also can't blame myself in any useful way because it was just something that happened, maybe it was something that had to happen, I don't know. But what I know now is that no one else is going to drag me out of this rut, there is no lottery win over the horizon, no long lost relative who is going to die and leave me their fortune, if I want things to change then I need to pick myself up off the floor and make it happen myself.

And I am starting, not with some great money making venture but with small gestures, notes, journal reflections.  I intend to simply pay attention again, like I used to, because not only an I not a whole person without nurturing my creative spirit, but I am a far less effective parent to boot. Hopefully I'll be seeing lots more of you all over the coming weeks and months, be with me, wish me well, I need this.

This Weeks Menu

Last week we didn't stick rigidly to our menu.  We had friends over on Saturday which was a change of plan to what we were expecting so I had to do a quick top-up-shop to get enough in for them, then my sisters came to stay for the weekend and we visited Edenbridge Agricultural Show where we had a picnic, so there was quite a bit in the way of leftovers for lunches and dinners that followed. But having this menu isn't about being strict or restrictive, we are flexible with it and we make IT fit into our lives we don't make our lives fit into IT. I think that is quite an important distinction to make and one which flows through all aspects of our lives, I hope to talk more about routine in the future.
When I shared our menu with you last week I forgot to mention something that is quite important for our meal planning.  We have the sames meals each week!  I know that sounds really boring, there is  a little more to it than that.  We have the same basic food but made in different ways.  So for example on Sunday evening we always have a pasta meal, but that could be a pasta bake, a bolognese or a pasta and sauce dish etc.  It gives a bit of predictability to the week and makes meal planning and budgeting easier (I got the idea from reading Simplicity Parenting by Kim John Payne).  I don't intend on sticking rigidly to this week in week out, just like the meal plan, some weeks I will swap days around and I intend on altering it slightly with the changing seasons, but it gives me a basic template to follow.
Here is how the week looks at the moment:

Lunches:
Monday - Soup,
Tuesday - Egg,
Wednesday - Sandwiches,
Thursday - Soup,
Friday - Egg,
Saturday - Leftovers or Sandwiches,
Sunday - Fish.

Dinners:
Monday - Pizza,
Tuesday - Fish,
Wednesday - Jacket potatoes,
Thursday - Meat,
Friday - Takeaway or ready meal,
Saturday - Vegetarian dish,
Sunday - Pasta and Sauce

So here is this weeks menu:


Wednesday:
Lunch - Egg mayonnaise and tomato sandwiches,
Dinner - Jacket Potatoes with baked beans, cheese and home made coleslaw,

Thursday:
Lunch - Home made courgette soup with wholemeal toast and butter,
Dinner - Chicken with Salad, home made coleslaw and potato salad,

Friday:
Lunch - Eggy bread with home made coleslaw, chutney and cheese,
Dinner - Takeaway,

Saturday:
Lunch - Plough mans lunch with ham, cheese, chutney, salad, coleslaw and bread,
Dinner - Veggie Quorn chunk wraps with salad,

Sunday:
Lunch - Fish finger sandwich on wholemeal bread with ketchup,
Dinner - Pasta and home made tomato sauce with artichoke hearts,

Monday:
Lunch - Courgette soup with wholemeal bread and butter,
Dinner - Pizza with bacon, mushrooms, onion and cheese,

Tuesday:
Lunch - Egg mayonnaise sandwiches with tomato,
Dinner - Home made salmon fish cakes with rice and salad,

 This weeks Courgette soup

What do you have planned for meals this week?  Do you do a meal plan?

Shopping and Meal Planning

Up until about a year ago I had no system for buying food and planning meals and I often lamented how difficult it was to stick to a budget and to decide what to buy in the supermarket.  I would often come out of the store with several bags full of shopping and a much lighter purse and I would look through my bags and think "what on earth can we have for dinner". 
That was until I had a conversation with one of my friends.  She complained about how annoying it can be to get stuck behind someone in the supermarket who is just browsing, not knowing what to buy and going from one end of the supermarket to the other. And I thought "oh, that's me".  She explained to me how she planned her meals for a week and made a shopping list of what she needed.  The shop took a lot less time and it helped her stick to a budget.  Can you believe this idea have never occurred to me before?!
So I started writing a meal plan for the week and a shopping list of things to buy and it has made things so much easier.  It also means we eat a wider variety of meals and are much less likely to run out of things mid week and need to do top-up shops. I don't always stick to our budget but I am pretty sure we spend less than we did before making a list. 

I thought I would share our weekly meal plan for this week, it includes lunches and dinners.  For breakfast I switch between porridge which I make with rice milk and have with golden syrup and a glass of orange juice (most days), cereal, normally some variety of granola with soya milk (when I am out of porridge or rice milk) and drop scone pancakes once a week, usually on a Saturday).

So why am I sharing this with you?  Well writing a meal plan and shopping list every week is one of the few things I do as a matter of routine which I really think help to make our lives simpler, help us stick to a budget and reduce our stress, so surely it can't be a bad thing it someone reads this and takes it up and makes their life simpler and less stressful? I am certainly not saying "look how great I am, everyone should be like me"  I am openly "imperfect" after all, I really just want to share the things in my life that seem to work.  This one ritual really keeps me grounded and, like cleaning the bathroom is a ritual that keeps me centered throuhgout the peaks and flows of certainty and uncertainty that come and go throughout the week.  It is nice to know that this one thing will almost always be there to ground me, ready for whatever the week may bring.

I do my weekly shop on a Wednesday so the week runs Wednesday to Tuesday, here is this weeks meal plan:

Wednesday:
Lunch - Cheese and tomato sandwiches on wholemeal bread,
Dinner - Jacket potatoes with bakes beans and grated cheese with homemade coleslaw.

Thursday:
Lunch - Home made leek and potato soup with wholemeal toast,
Dinner - Quorn mince with homemade veg and tomato sauce in wraps with salad and grated cheese.

Friday:
Lunch - Omega 3 Pollock fish finger sandwiches on wholemeal bread,
Dinner - Takeaway.

Saturday:
Lunch - Egg mayonnaise and tomato sandwiches,
Dinner - Sausage with mashed potato, broccoli, carrots, peas and gravy.

Sunday:
Lunch - Home made pea and ham soup,
Dinner - Pasta with homemade tomato sauce and bacon with grated cheese.

Monday:
Lunch - Ham salad sandwiches on wholemeal bread,
Dinner - Home made pizza with ham and mushroom.

Tuesday:
Lunch - Eggy bread with grated cheese, chutney and home made coleslaw,
Dinner - Home made salmon fish cakes with potato wedges, homemade coleslaw and salad.

When I make my shopping list I divide the items I need into categories to make going round the supermarket easier, I don't have to dash from one end of the shop to the other.  My categories are typically: Fruit, vegetables, meat, dairy, bread and other.  I won't bore you with the shopping list, if you want to use this meal plan you can probably work out what you need, and besides, I already had some of the things I needed in the house so it wouldn't be a complete list anyway.

So there we have it, I hope it is useful.  I plan on sharing more of my weekly meal plans because I hope that making it public will help me to take responsibility for what we are eating a bit more, it might make me make more healthy, seasonal choices if I know others are potentially judging what I am buying, eek!!

So do you write a shopping list each week?  How do you make sure you stick to a budget? What are some of your favourite meals?  I would love to know.

Eco-friendly Bathroom Cleaning

This post was originally published on Serendipity Child on Sunday 17th March 2013

Let me just make things clear from the start because some people do get confused, I don't like cleaning, what I like is things being clean, there is a difference, and this is key to what follows.
Before I have a bath, I always give it a clean, I don't like that soapy scummy thing than stays on the bath after it's been used to shower in, so why would I let my lovely baby wash in a bath with scummy sides if I am not willing to? With that in mind I wash the bath before he uses it.  To maintain a bed time routine we wash him every night so, therefore, I wash the bath every night.  I realise this may sound excessive but it has actually made life a little bit easier easier and happier, so that can't be a bad thing.

The process of cleaning itself has also received a transformation of late, in the past I used ecover cleaners, or when that ran out I used whatever shampoo or shower gel we had lying around not being used.  But I was never really happy with how clean it was, there were still water marks and lumps of limescale here and there.  I started to use vinegar and bicarbonate of soda to clean the bathroom initially because I had run out of anything else and this was a last resort, (I had read about it somewhere)  to my happy amazement the more I used it, the cleaner the bathroom got, it is so much shiner than it ever has been.  I realise this may sound like a really dull thing to share, and I am not telling you to say "look how wonderful and eco-friendly I am" (clearly not that eco-friendly or I would have been doing this all along) or "aren't I amazing, I clean the bathroom everyday"  but we use the bathroom a lot and it being clean and tidy makes me happy, and knowing I am harming the environment and my health less also makes me happy so it might make you happy too (sharing the love).

Bicarbonate of soda and vinegar are far safer for the environment than the medley of chemicals that most bathroom cleaners contain which contaminate the waterways and use of valuable fossil fuels to extract, not to mention the risk of skin irritation and potential lung damage from toxic fumes and perfumes.  There is also less waste afterwards because I am buying less packaging so throwing less away, and it is waaaay better for the purse as well because bicarbonate of soda and vinegar are super cheap.
Here is what happens:
I go up to the bathroom at Boris' bedtime and hose down the bath and walls,  I then spray round the bath and walls with a solution of distilled malt vinegar and water (about half vinegar to water) then I sprinkle bicarbonate of soda on a loofah.  I then scrub round the bath and walls of the shower and the tap and shower fixings.  I do the same on the basin and spray the bowl of the toilet.  I then hose down the bath and walls and rinse round the basin with a cotton cloth. I sprinkle some bicarbonate of soda into the toilet bowl and scrub round with the loo brush, I then wipe over the whole of the toilet with a wet cotton cloth, then again with a dry cotton cloth (top to bottom with the bowl the last thing). I then run the bath and while the bath is running I do one of the following each day - spray the window and window sill with the vinegar solution and wipe with a cotton cloth, do the same on the mirror and shelf above the basin, spray and wipe the shelf behind the toilet, clean the walls, wipe the floor.

This whole process takes no more than about 7 minutes and means that every time I or a guest go in the bathroom I know it is going to be clean. Gone are the days when I would spend over an hour once a week cleaning the bathroom, an experience I used to dread, because it is cleaned so frequently the dirt doesn't get a chance to accumulate so it wipes away much more easily that is it has been festering for a week.  Quite often my husband will do the cleaning instead of me so that's even less work.  He was worried that the bathroom would end up smelling like a chip shop but the smell goes within a couple of minutes.

I get a big tub of bicarbonate of soda and a big bottle of vinegar from Makro because it's really cheap.  I think the bicarb was about £1.99 (1.15 kg) and the vinegar about £2.99 (5 litres).  I could get organic vinegar and bicarb from the True Food co-op if I was going to be really ethical, but it is more expensive and cost is more of a priority for our family at the moment.  I use a loofah to scrub with because I don't like the thought of the small pieces of plastic breaking off a conventional sponge and entering the waterways and I use cotton cloths that I cut from an old, thinning towel and hemmed.
I really hope I have encouraged you to have a go at using bicarbonate of soda and vinegar to clean your bathroom because it is far better than any conventional cleaners I have tried.
Let me know how you get on.